Camp Cuddly Pines Powertool Massacre (2005)

This is the first adult film reviewed on Camp movie Camp... and to change things up a little bit. I thought I'd Live Blog this as I watch it...

I obviously can't show screen caps... or post trailers... but please see this.

Enjoy:

Teenagers in a van... typical.

Metalicide concert! really? metalicide? that is actually probably a shitty nu metal band.

"is that all you think about?... doing it?".... "i'm sorry what was that?... I was thinking about doing it!"

2 couples have sex while in the van while a nerd films all within the first 3 minutes.

Holy shit this is actually funny.

Homeless guy just got hit by a van 3 times.

Yup... homeless dead guy on the roof of the van sitting up with a telephone pole in the background giving the appearance of huge boner... someone actually thought about this before filming it... shocking/funny.

Hmmm.... did Kinzie Kenner get her boob job removed? Or was this before then...either way she looks MUCH better this way.

The upside down sex thing is neither attractive nor comfortable... neither is the heavily breathing creepy dude staring in from the window.

Total homage to Halloween now.

Creepy old guy telling a story around a campfire.

PA insane asylum reference!

AWESOME! 4 girls on 1 dude!

Oh hey! Rita Faltoyano! that mole is still goin' strong... ugh.

It's odd that the crazy female inmates are so sexy and have so much makeup and so little clothes!... who would have thought.

It's steamy in here... clean the lens camera dude...or turn down the fog machine!

Off to the bar/Jim's cheese steaks.

Ok back from the bar/jims cheese steaks.

They are still going strong! 4 on 1! I think this means I win at life.

This scene ended exactly how i pictured it.... awesomely!

Back to the campfire story.

"is that all you think about?... doing it?".... "i'm sorry what was that?... I was thinking about doing it!" This line? AGAIN?

Katie Morgan! SWEET!
(fact: the reason Katie Morgan got into porn was to pay off her fines for smuggling over a hundred pounds of weed into the country... read it in her linked name... also.. AWESOME!)

CLOWN WITH POWERTOOL!

DEAD!.... and naked!

Back to campfire story.

Now it's looking to be a texas chainsaw massacre porn!

WHAT THE FUCK! Sexy Native American Spirit guide... seriously?

She is glowing.

Oh shit they are gonna do it.

"Consider this the first thanksgiving... Pilgrim!!!!!!!"

BEST. MOVIE. EVER!

"watch the teeth!..."

AND THEN A FUCKING LEOPARD BITES THE DUDES DICK OFF! straight out of nowhere!

Still funny horror comedy going on... surprisingly better acting than i thought... also big boobs.

"maybe the creepy caretaker was right..."

Good thing the sheriff showed up... doubt he's gonna do it with anyone.

whoops... I was wrong... doing it!

It's so cold in this cabin we found. someone should get some firewood so that the nerdy virgin guy can be alone with the 2 hot buxom ladies just craving some action for the first time in an hour.

Oh what the fuck! the Ring was just ripped off... hes fucking the girl from the well.... this is amazing.

"Oh... thats creepy" (as he gets a beej)

"NASTY WELL GIRL"

I am buying this movie. genius.

"DONT SPIN YOUR HEAD IN A 360" Best scene in the movie.

Well I was wrong about the nerd gettin' it with 2 chicks. just one.... and it was hot.

It has now turned into a horror.

Lead character dead and the sheriff shows up. He is one of the funniest dudes in the movie.

Revenge of the Nerds reference.

Chase scene...

Scream reference!

The blonde needs to comfort the nerd in the woods... i mean it IS scary.

BWAHAHAHAHAhAhAHAhAhA Sheriff attacked by raccoon.

I am not gonna ruin the end of the movie for you..

BUT SEE THIS!