VHS Cover of the Day: Roller Blade (1986)

VHS Cover of the Day: Bloody New Year (1987)

CampMovieCamp is one year old! Still not potty trained though.

VHS cover courtesy of Darsh!

VHS Cover of the Day: Violated (1984)

Ironic that this was released by Virgin home video?

Hard Ticket to Hawaii Remake

As it is with most Hollywood classics, it's only a matter of time until we get a remake...

VHS Cover of the Day: Mandroid (1993)

Joe Bob Briggs interviews Andy Sidaris

Man I miss Joe Bob being on national TV.

Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987)

I'm not sure why no one told me about Andy Sidaris before, but holy hell, his movies are insane! Not Malice in Wonderland insane, but like everything you've ever wanted in a movie plus snakes insane! Specifically, I'm talking about Hard Ticket to Hawaii.

This is a dude's movie all around, filled with gratuitous everything, from explosions to boobs to one liners to sports to shallow villains and well shit EVERYTHING AWESOME. I could probably go on about how thin and ridiculous the plot is, but it'd be like like telling Clint Howard he has a big forehead, he already knows! This movie in no way attempts to be anything other than what I described and that's the way writer/director Sidaris likes it. It's admittedly trashy, terrible and tasteless, but I promise you, it's a hell of a lot better than a Brendan Fraser movie. Quickie plot synopsis (this is going to be hard), but ok, some agents of some kind are in Hawaii and find some diamonds that drug dealers lost in a little helicopter. After a failed attempt to recover the diamonds, an agent and her friend call in some other friends and go give the drug dealers hell. Oh and there's a snake that has rat cancer.

Here's a couple clips from the movie, there are more if you search on youtube, this movie's a gold mine.

It doesn't surprise me that these movies get made, but what does surprise me is that Hard Ticket to Hawaii had two original songs for it! WHHAAATTT?! Sorry I am hyper, I just finished watching it and am pumped is all. Here is one of those amazing tunes.

Gary Stockdale - Hard Ticket

VHS Cover of the Day: Hands of Steel (1986)

aka Vendetta dal Futuro

Malice in Wonderland (1982)

This truly frightening animated short directed by Victor Collins makes Tim Burton's upcoming Alice in Wonderland look like Little House on the Prairie.

9, 10 never sleep again...

(via Extracurriculars)

Ten More Movies Turned Failed TV Shows

Ok. After our previous dig into the wretched depths of small screen adaptations, the general consensus is that not only are there way more pieces to examine, but there could possibly be way worse pieces as well. We won't argue either point, as we said before, there are a ton of shitty short-lived television shows based movies, at least compared to the successes. So, again we present ten more examples of boob tube boobery. Shows of note: Bill and Ted (I wish this one would've made it...), Gung Ho with Scott Bakula as Michael Keaton (also with Clint Howard and Gede Watanabe), Working Girl with Sandra Bullock (do you think she remembers making this show? No one else does), and Freddy's Nightmares, and like the Friday the 13th show, it has little to do with the movies really. It's more of an anthology show. And perhaps the most baffling, The Net. Seriously?

Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventures



Weird Science



Freddy's Nightmares



BeastMaster



Mortal Kombat: Conquest



F/X: The Series



Tales From the Neverending Story



Working Girl



The Net



Gung Ho

What're your favorite failed movie TV shows?

DVD Cover of the Day: Psycho Kickboxer (1997)

courtesy of Darsh!

VHS Cover of the Day: Phase IV (1974)

VHS Cover of the Day: Golden NInja Warrior (1986)

Silver Screen to Small Stinky Screen

People will often say Hollywood is hard up for ideas with all the remakes and unnecessary sequels/prequels/reboots but one could definitely argue that television has had a rougher go of it. There are enough crappy shows out there that producers will want a sure thing, "Hey! That movie was good! Let's make a it show! Yay!" There have been some successes for sure, biggies like MASH, Buffy, Stargate, The Odd Couple, Young Indiana Jones was even a decent show. I think some people even like the Terminator Sarah Connor show. There have a been a ton really. But check out this small sampling of ridiculous and short lived small screen spin offs, some of which i admittedly tuned in for...

Timecop (1997)



Uncle Buck (1990)



Delta House (Animal House) (1979)



Honey I Shrunk the Kids (1997)



Harry and the Hendersons (1991)



Tremors (2003)



Ferris Bueller (1990)



Robocop (1994)



Police Academy (1997)



Blade (2007)

Here's a great glimpse into 15 TV shows that almost were, including The Jerk, Revenge of the Nerds, Fargo and Driving Miss Daisy!

Revenge of the Nerds Pilot

And yes, there was even a Poltergeist tv series.

Unborn II (1994)

If you are snowed in like most of the Philly area, and you are looking for a "good" movie to watch, check out Unborn II. You'll never play with kids in the snow the same again!

Ultraman Monsters Dance to MJ

Yeah I don't know, but it's awesome.

via monster brains

VHS Cover of the Day: Blood Debts (1984)

via critical condition

William Robert Thornton

I remember when Bo Jackson was hot shit as a double sport athlete back in the day. He definitely earned the hype because, well, he was good at what he did. I'm not sure why the double up doesn't work as well in the acting/singing field, though there have definitely been successes throughout the years. The pile of suck is great though, as I definitely find some charm in failed celebrity albums. Bruce Willis, Joe Pesci, John Travolta, even Steven Seagal have all released albums but what baffles me most is Billy Bob Thornton is still releasing albums! I've read a ton of positive reviews but I just don't hear it honestly.

So why, if I am not fond of his music, would I want to post this sampler from his very first release? Well in addition to four horrendous, if not entertaining music tracks are four interview tracks on his inspiration and love for music, all the usual crap musicians say. What's best is that this release was during his Angelina Days, so there's a lot of funny anecdotes and lyrics here in retrospect. I am being hard on the guy for sure, but he's sold a ton of albums since this release and was even listed in the top 20 Americana albums of 2009 from the AMA. I will let you guys judge though.

And his website...a feast for the eyes to be sure...

Billy Bob - Private Radio Sampler

VHS Cover of the Day: Terror on Tape (1983)

via critical condition

Greg Grunberg in Witchcraft V: Dance With the Devil

When my wife agreed to watch Witchcraft V on VHS with me the other night, I thought I was the luckiest dude ever. I was completely wrong. Witchcraft V totally sucked! I wasn't expecting much honestly, but I especially wasn't expecting this short scene with Greg Grunberg from Heroes:

Now even more surprising than seeing loveable Greg here, is that FIVE of these Witchcraft movies were made. So I looked them up and to my horror there have actually been THIRTEEN Witchcraft turds released on the world! Lord have mercy on us all.


Full trailer for part 5 here...

I guess part 5 never made it to DVD, but you can get Witchcraft 666: The Devil's Mistressfrom amazon.

VHS Cover of the Day: Death Machine (1994)